Yugi and Kaiba rematch
by theiratepupil
Summary: A parody of the second duel between Yugi and Kaiba (no, not the dark clown guy that Pegassus brought from the shadow realm earlier)
1. Default Chapter

Yu-gi-oh Special Bonus:  
  
The. "real" script for the second duel of Yugi versus Kaiba (not including the Dark Kaiba guy who later turned into that fat ugly clown) .Okay, this is really a pun on that episode, and this ain't the real script, BUT IT SHOULD BE!!! Sorry. Anyway, enjoy reading this.  
  
  
  
Joey: There it is! Pegassus's castle. Come on, let's go!!  
  
Tristan: Hey, wait for me you big loser!  
  
Bakura: Shut up you big oaf!!  
  
Joey: Wanna start something, you big cheesehead?!  
  
Tristan: Bring it on, chiouwawa!  
  
Bakura: I'll cream both of you dopes!!  
  
Joey: You and what army, wormbrain?!  
  
Yugi (to himself): Ah, it's nice to have such great friends who care about each other so much.  
  
Tristan: Hey! You'll never believe who's blocking our way into the castle!  
  
Yugi: (gasp) It's Kaiba!  
  
Kaiba: It's been a while, Yugi. I was hoping I'd run into you.  
  
Yugi: What do you want, Kaiba?  
  
Kaiba (sarcastically): I wanted to ask you what time it is. What do you think, genius?! I want to duel you again!!  
  
Yugi: Why? I already have 10 star chips.  
  
Kaiba: 'cause I said so. And because I want to duel you so I can gain access to the castle to save Mokuba.  
  
Joey: Get a life, you loser!! Yugi doesn't have to duel you if he doesn't want to!! I'll duel you , you jerk! Bring it on, melonhead!  
  
Tristan: Get a hold of yourself!  
  
Bakura: Remember your last duel? He slaughtered you!  
  
Tea: Like you can do any better?  
  
Bakura: Oh, you wanna start something?!  
  
Tea: No problem, dope.  
  
Bakura: Punk!  
  
Tea: Freak!  
  
Bakura: Mashed potato head!  
  
Tea: Mashed potato head?? What the-.  
  
Bakura: Eh, I ran out of good insults.  
  
Voice: YUGIOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! (sizzle sizzle spark spark crackle crackle)  
  
(Yugi millennium puzzle breaks down again)  
  
Yugi: Huh? Why isn't it working still?  
  
Bakura: Lemme help.  
  
Yugi: Are you going to use the incredible powers of your millennium ring to magically restore its power?  
  
Bakura: Something like that.  
  
(Bakura starts smashing the millennium puzzle hard with his ring about ten times)  
  
Bakura: There.  
  
Yugi: Uh, thanks.  
  
Voice: YUGIOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!  
  
Yami Yugi: Kaiba! I accept your challenge!  
  
Tea: Is it me, or has Yugi grown a foot taller, his hair a few inches taller and his voice gotten two octaves lower?  
  
Joey: Don't be silly! We're idiots. We're not supposed to notice stuff like that.  
  
Tea: Oh yeah.  
  
Kaiba: Okay then, Yugi. We will duel on top of Pegassus's castle where it will be decided: Who is truly the better duelist? Who will claim the right to face Pegassus in a duel? Will you be able to beat me without Exodia? How will you stand against my Blue-eyes-ultimate dragon-.oops.darn it!!  
  
Tristan: Okay, for the world champion duelist, Kaiba sure is stupid to reveal his strategy to the one duelist capable of defeating him.  
  
Yami Yugi: The Blue-eyes Ultimate Dragon. The most powerful monster in the game created by fusing three Blue-Eyes White Dragons.  
  
Kaiba: Doy, Genius! Why do you think I wanted to do that in the first place?  
  
Yugi: I don't know. Why didn't you think of doing that the last time we dueled?  
  
(There is a long pause)  
  
Kaiba: You're asking for it, Yugi!!  
  
(Later, on top of the castle)  
  
Kaiba: Let's begin Yugi. Prepare to meet your doom! You will not last against me! I am the ultimate duelist! I am the champion! I can never be defeated again! I-  
  
Yami Yugi: -better shut up so we can actually duel!  
  
Kaiba: Funny, Yugi. Funny.  
  
Yami Yugi: You will never defeat me, Kaiba. You don't trust and believe in the heart of the cards. You must believe, Kaiba. The heart of the cards and my friends will hold me through this. My friends have always come through for me, and together, we have conquered many tasks. My friendship will Bakura, Tristan, Joey.and Tea.I mean, Tea will give me a great amount of guidance through this sure to be ever-lasting duel.  
  
Kaiba: Excuse me while I go barf my guts out. Honestly, Yugi. You're making me sick! You're starting to sound like Tea!  
  
Tea: He should be, that's my line!  
  
Yami Yugi: Very well then. I summon Curse of Dragon.  
  
Kaiba: Then I summon Ryu-Kishin! In attack mode!  
  
Yami Yugi: That's Ryu-Kishin Powered!  
  
Kaiba: Whatever.  
  
Yami Yugi: Curse of Dragon!! Attack Ryu-Kishin!!  
  
Kaiba (mockingly): Powered!  
  
Yami Yugi: You're pushing it! You're monster is destroyed anyway. Coming from you, that was a bad starting move Kaiba!  
  
Kaiba: Or was it? I summon Swordstalker in attack mode!!  
  
Yami Yugi: Kaiba, it has the same attack power.  
  
Kaiba: But I'm using the power of my Ryu-Kishin-  
  
Yami Yugi: Powered!  
  
Kaiba: Stop that. -to make my Swordstalker more powerful! It's attack is now.higher than 2000. Go Swordstalker!! Attack Curse Of Dragon!!  
  
(Curse of Dragon disappers)  
  
Kaiba: Huh? Where did the card go!??!  
  
Yami Yugi: Heh heh heh.You didn't expect this, did you Kaiba? I used a trap card to switch my Curse of Dragon with my highest attack power monster for this turn. And that monster would be.Dark Magician!! You're Swordstalker is destroyed!!  
  
Kaiba: Fine then! I summon La Jinn The Mystical Genie.  
  
Yami Yugi: Of the Lamp!!!  
  
Kaiba: That's really getting old. But his wish is my command! And I combine La Jinn with my Mystical Lamp card to raise its attack and allow it to protect itself in the lamp after it attacks!!  
  
(Yami Yugi chuckles softly)  
  
Kaiba: What is it now?!  
  
Yami Yugi: Poor Kaiba. La Jinn is a Genie and obeys its master. But maybe some genies obey anyone.  
  
Kaiba: What do you mean?  
  
Yami Yugi: La Jinn! I command you to self-destruct!  
  
(It explodes)  
  
Kaiba: Ahhhh!! My La Jinn! Impossible! You couldn't have just done that Yugi! How how how??!  
  
Yami Yugi: You have to believe in the heart of the cards!  
  
Kaiba: You used a Fissure card, didn't you?  
  
Yami Yugi: What?!! How dare you accuse me of playing that card when I believed in the heart of the cards!! I would never do such a thing.it was Raigeki.  
  
Kaiba: GGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!  
  
Kaiba (thinking): Yugi may have defeated my strategies, clever as they were, but he still doesn't suspect my master plan. To combine all three Blue-Eyes in my deck to create.The Blue-Eyes Ultimate Dragon!!!  
  
Kaiba: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!  
  
Yami Yugi: You told me about your Blue-Eyes Ultimate Strategy before, remember? Don't go all crazy on me.  
  
Kaiba: Oops. Oh yeah.  
  
Yugi (thinking): Hmm. He doesn't have any monster cards out on the field, so I can attack his life points directly. But what if that trap card he has face down deflects it. I remember he told me of a card that deflects an attacking monster's ATK points back at your opponent for direct damage. What if he has that card?  
  
Kaiba (thinking): I'm doomed. In one turn, he's gonna wipe me out. But wait. What if Yugi is going delirious and thinks I have some sort of card that can deflect attacks back as direct damage?  
  
Yugi (thinking): This is bad. But what if Kaiba thinks I'm going delirious and there is no such card as what I'm thinking of? Maybe I can win this after all.  
  
Kaiba (thinking): This doesn't look good. What if Yugi is knows I'm thinking he's going delirious and he thinks that I know there is no such card as what he thinks I have.  
  
Kaiba: GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!  
  
Yami Yugi: GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!  
  
Kaiba: GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!  
  
Yami Yugi: GRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!  
  
Yami Yugi and Kaiba: GGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
TO BE CONTINUED. 


	2. Yugi and Kaiba rematch part 2

Yugi vs Kaiba Part 2.  
  
  
  
Yami Yugi: Curse of Dragon attack!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Kaiba: Yes! I forgot I had this card, Yugi. Mirror Force. And as you know, your Curse of Dragon goes to the graveyard. Now it's my turn, and I play Sagi the Dark Clown!!  
  
Yami Yugi: I play Gaia the Fierce Knight!!  
  
Kaiba: Heh heh heh heh heh heh heh heh.  
  
Yami Yugi: Stop laughing! You think that crush card has me clueless?!  
  
Kaiba: What?! How did you know about that?!  
  
Yami Yugi: You're playing it face up.  
  
Kaiba: Darn it!!! I gotta stop doing things like that!!  
  
Yugi: I play Change of Heart to bring your Sagi to my side of the field for now! And now I ATTACK WITH SAGI THE DARK CLOWN REALEASE THE CRUSH VIRUS ON YOUR DECK!!!  
  
Kaiba: Darn it again!! Why have you gotten so good?  
  
Yugi: Just because my grandfather's not here right now doesn't mean I can't break into his shop every night and steal some of his cards. I don't steal all of them at first cause, you know, there's that whole issue with me almost getting caught and arrested.  
  
Kaiba: Just go already!  
  
Yami Yugi: It's your turn.  
  
Kaiba: Oh. I play the Blue-Eyes-  
  
Yami Yugi: -Deck virus.  
  
Kaiba: .uh.a different card in defense mode.  
  
Yami Yugi: Dark Magician attack!!  
  
Kaiba: Uh, another in defense mode!!  
  
Yami Yugi: Attack!!  
  
Kaiba: Defense!  
  
Yami Yugi: Attack!  
  
Kaiba: Defense!  
  
Yami Yugi: Attack!  
  
Kaiba: Oh all right already! You win! Bye.  
  
Yami yugi: Wait!! What about Mokuba?!  
  
Kaiba: Oh yeah.  
  
(He runs and jumps off the castle)  
  
Bakura: Uh, that's not how he's supposed to do it is it?  
  
Kaiba: HEEEELLLLPPPPP!!!! I FORGOT ABOUT SOMETHING!!!  
  
(Everyone runs to the edge to find Kaiba hanging on the a lower ledge)  
  
Kaiba: I forgot I need to threaten to jump off the ledge before I even lose so I'll win outta pity.  
  
Tristan: Heh heh! Stinks for you!  
  
Joey: Later, loser!  
  
Kaiba: Wait! Don't leave me hanging!  
  
(rimshot)  
  
Yami Yugi: Maybe you do deserve to be freed.  
  
Kaiba: Really?  
  
Yami Yugi (thinking): Let him fall. He deserves it.  
  
Normal Yugi (thinking): No, we can't let him to his doom.  
  
Yami (thinking): He's finally getting what's coming to him.  
  
Yugi (thinking) : No! He'll learn some other way! There must be another way!!  
  
Yami (thinking): There isn't!.  
  
Kaiba: Great! Of all the times for Yugi to be battling with his inner millennium spirit. Hurry up, Yugi!!!  
  
Yugi (thinking): Nah, you're right!  
  
(He walks away)  
  
Kaiba: Oh well.  
  
(He lets go of the ledge)  
  
Kaiba: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!  
  
(Thud)  
  
Kaiba: Ow! Oh yeah I forgot! I can't die! I'm an anime character!  
  
  
  
The End 


End file.
